Baba's
  
KOVALAN : Which shaving cream do u use?
PACHU : Baba's

KOVALAN : Which aftershave do u use?
PACHU : Baba's

KOVALAN : Which deodrant do u use?
PACHU : Baba's

KOVALAN: Which toothpaste do u use?
PACHU: Baba's

KOVALAN: Which banian do u use?
PACHU: Baba's

KOVALAN: Which vests do u use?
PACHU: Baba's

KOVALAN(Bugged up) : Accha tell me, What is this Baba? Is it an international company???
PACHU(With smile) : No, He is my room-mate.
  
 Pilots

The passengers on a plane are waiting for their flight to leave when twomen, both wearing dark glasses, dressed in pilot uniforms, walk up the aisle. One is being led by a seeing-eye dog, and the other is tapping his way with a cane. Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin as the men go into the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start. The passengers are all looking around for some sign that this is just a little practical joke, but there is none. As the plane moves faster and faster down the runway, the people at the windows realize that they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport. As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off and will plow into the water, screams of panic fill the cabin. But just at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air. In the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they're going to scream too late, and we're all gonna die." "
 
 Overworked

For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked!

-The population of this country is 237 million.
----104 million are retired.
-That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school,
-Which leaves 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government,
--leaving 19 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the Armed Forces,
--which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.

Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Governments
---and that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals,
leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
--That leaves just two people to do the work.

You and me.
And you are sitting at your computer reading jokes...

 
 Little Red Riding Hood
Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees a big bad
wolf crouched down behind a log. "My, what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf."
The wolf jumps up and runs away.
Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this
time he is crouched behind a bush. "My what big ears you have, Mr. Wolf."
Again the wolf jumps up and runs away.
About two miles down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and
this time he is crouched down behind a rock. "My what big teeth you have Mr.
Wolf."
With that the wolf jumps up and screams, "Will you go away, I'm trying
to shit!"
 
 9 Months later?
  
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. They loaded up Jack's mini van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. They pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night. "I realize it's terrible weather out there, and I have this huge house all to myself, but I've recently widowed", she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house." "Don't worry", Jack said. "We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we’ll be gone at first light." The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night.
Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up North?"
Bob said, "Yes, I do."
"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"
"Yes", Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out. "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned red and he said, "Yeah, sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything."

And you thought the ending would be different, didn't you? Caught you smiling :)